Annoyed Librarian
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Inside Annoyed Librarian

A Day in the Life of the Annoyed Librarian

There’s a new blog "meme" going around! I love blog memes, because they’re a great way for librarians who don’t have anything interesting to say to focus their blogging. Actually, this is true of non-librarians as well, so don’t take my comments personally, you librarians-who-tend-to-take-the-AL-personally, you. The latest I’ve seen is a "day in the life" meme someone at LIS News posted about. As memes go, that’s a pretty clever one, and I’m glad some clever person came up with it, because I, too, have nothing to write about since I haven’t had time to focus my thoughts on how libraries are eminently bourgeois institutions and why they should stay that way.

You might think a day in the life of the Annoyed Librarian is mostly pleasant and enjoyable. You’d be correct, but in the spirit of personal openness these memes inspire, I’ll lay out a typical day in the life of the Annoyed Librarian. Or yesterday, at least.

9:00am: The Annoyed Librarian awakens as the aroma of coffee wafts into her bedroom. Coffee is good. People making coffee for me is better. I murmur a pleasant "good morning" as a cup of steamy goodness is deposited by my bedside and the gentle strains of Brahms lilt through the apartment.

9:00 – 10:00am: I drink my coffee and nibble some toast and fruit while reading the news and responding to email. Wheat toast and strawberries are my favorite, but I’m flexible. No Pop-tarts or leftover pizza or anything like that, though. What an awful way to start the morning! When news in real world gets too depressing, I read library news and get a chuckle.

10:00 – 10:45am: Bathing, dressing, etc.

10:45am – 11:00am: Head to the library. Acclimate myself to the musty surroundings.

11:00am – 1:00pm: Meet with people about library things. This is the low point in the day, when I start to wonder what some librarians would do if they didn’t have someone to clean up after them and change their little nappies.

1:00pm – 2:00pm: Lunch. You might think that the AL has an exorbitant lunch every day at the Algonquin Round Table, but no. The AL prefers yogurt in the park with a quiet book, perhaps followed by a short walk if the weather’s nice.

2:00pm – 3:30pm: Meet with some more people about more library things. By this time I’m usually thinking most people could solve their own darn problems if either, a) they put any effort into it, or b) obstructionist people would commit suicide to put themselves out of our misery. Usually one of the other or maybe both is all it takes.

3:30pm – 4:00pm: Head to the enormous corner office on the 30th floor of the famous Library Journal Building. Have Chip make me a skim latte and massage my feet.

4:00pm – 4:30pm. Read the AL fan mail. Research the blog. Write the posts. They don’t pay me this enormous salary for nothing!

4:30 – 5:30pm: A little yoga. Some prefer yoga to wake themselves up. I like to unwind after my tough day.

5:30pm -  7:30pm: Happy Hour! My favorite part of the day. I’m fond of a Tanqueray martini or two, which Chip mixes for myself and the AL minions. Ideally, there will be cheese and some of those plum tomatoes to snack on.

7:30pm – 8:30pm: Depending on the intensity of the conversation or the martinis, I’m not always sure what happens during this time.It’s fun, though.

8:30-9:30pm: Dinner, mostly. Last night I had some very tasty sushi.

10:00pm: By now, at least on a weeknight, I’m back home and relaxing. This it prime reading time. What can I say? I’m a bookish wallflower at heart. I might also deal with email or library crises if there are any, but I prefer to relax with an improving book.

Midnight: Sleepytime for the AL. One needs one’s beauty sleep.

So there you have it, a typical weekday for the AL. The weekends are much the same, except fewer library meetings and more social events. At least now you can see that I have no more glamor than you in my daily life, only in my wardrobe.

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Comments

  1. AL=RK says:

    Gosh, did you ever think of twittering?

    I could use the sleep.

  2. Kurt says:

    A 15 minute morning commute?!?

    Wowzers!

  3. Clerkboy says:

    Wow! You have the greatest job on earth! Only three and a half hours of work with a half hour of blogging! How much do they pay you? I am jealous. Take care.

  4. AL=RK says:

    You forgot to add in the rest of your journalistic time.

  5. thelibrarygirl says:

    Perhaps I should do this meme except during the workday hours I will include the most craptastic remark made to me by a patron for that 60 minute period.

    It’s getting close to “martini time” in my time zone.

  6. sidney says:

    AL=RK, I’m not sure the AL tweets would be any more boring than those of most of my friends.

  7. Dances With Books says:

    I could not agree more: if those obstructionist SOBs would simply commit suicide and get out of our misery, it would be a better workplace. Sadly, the princess here is hanging on for dear life. Oh well.

  8. AlwaysWanted2B says:

    I am greatly disillusioned. For some reason I thought the AL had a real job.

  9. whiteshirt says:

    I realize libraries are one of the escalators to the middle class, but I am not sure that makes them eminently bourgois. There is a difference.

    Why do you think they “are and should remain eminently bourgois institutions”?

    I agree that the members of a Library Foundation-type institution often have more pretensions than diamonds and pearls; that persons of that class swan about as though all civic institutions are their own private real estate. But does that make it so?

    Public libraries are full of kids’ books about going to school and bed and cleaning teeth and putting on pyjamas rather than pitching a fit. … but they also contain other, darker texts, Thomas Paine, tory radicals, speakers of truth to power and mindrot.

  10. AL=RK says:

    AL does have a real job, but it is as a journalist and not a librarian.

    Those who can do.

    Those who can’t teach.

    Those who do either write about it as if they had a clue.

  11. Anonymous says:

    A daily account of a week in my life would read like a Mel Brooks version of a week in the life of a public librarian. Unfortunately, I cannot publish my account since my bosses might read it.

  12. fed up says:

    AL=RK wrote: “Those who can do. Those who can’t teach.”
    *sigh* Old and tired. Actually, those who can, teach.
    Period. No need to bash teachers on an annoyed librarian blog.

  13. Mr. Kat says:

    Those who can’t teach Administrate. Those who can’t Administrate run for political office.
    Those who can’t run for political office get appointed.

  14. Wendy Blue says:

    We could all use a Chip in our day *sigh*

  15. AL=RK says:

    Sorry fed, I didn’t mean to bash teachers, just journalists who pose as something that they are not.

  16. Beth says:

    AL=RK …why would anyone pose as a librarian? And are we equating blogging with being a journalist?

  17. AL=RK says:

    The AL got sloppy one day and AL’s true identity slipped out.

    It was quickly covered up so that Clark Kent could keep his/her journalistic cred going.

  18. really? says:

    You’d think with such a leisurely, relaxed schedule AL would be calmer and happier and not such a prick. I guess some people can always find something to bitch about no matter how good they’ve got it.

  19. geek says:

    “cup of steamy goodness is deposited by my bedside” – why does this sound a bit like toilet humor? :P

  20. TruTexan says:

    Hey LJ,

    Texas Librarians are showing their tats for charity! I’m sure this will bring in droves of patrons. LOL Classy.

    Maybe other librarians should just take bare all to bring in the cash. Or stripper librarians…yes, that’s a sure money-maker.

    http://www.txla.org/temp/tattoo.html

  21. TruTexan says:

    Oh gosh…my humblest apologies up front. I referred to the esteemed AL as LJ. I’m home from surgery in a Percoset induced state.

  22. a Chip says:

    I’m a Chip.

    Librarian-goddesses are awesome. I have one (or, I should say, she has me.) I gave her a backrub this morning before an interview she just aced.
    She’s smart and beautiful and looks askance at a lot of the stuff AL looks askance at. AL speaks for many great librarians who put up with a lot of c**p I think.

  23. b7nt5 says:

    *Librarian-goddesses are awesome. I have one (or, I should say, she has me.) I gave her a backrub this morning before an interview she just aced. *

    I sure do love these fictional authors who show up to post. They must only work part-time for Penthouse Letters.

  24. me too says:

    Those who can’t teach, teach gym.

  25. anonymous says:

    Amazing that the AL finds time in this busy schedule to write a column. Must be a burden…

  26. Kim says:

    I don’t know — I don’t read LJ online much because there are better things to do. However, I scanned while not fully reading the last few posts — upon scanning them, they seemed way too boring. This one I did read, and it was a little better, almost funny, almost like the AL of old. Still, it fell short of AL of bygone days that I discovered in the old blog. The voice in writing differs to the point to make me wonder if the same person is writing these posts as wrote the old blog. I’m off this weekend so maybe I’ll get to reading the slam of this post if any of you bother. And then, maybe not. The mountain climbing I’m usually involved in at this time of year is more important.

  27. UninvokedAuthor says:

    and to think, I spend most of my time trying to coax disgruntled and annoyed dogs through the bathing process. -.- I wish I had your job.

  28. My last reading says:

    Annoyed librarian – you define surplus labor. Like many of my ‘profession’, some time digging ditches and other forms of brutal hard labor would be apt. Hopefully, you will be a victim of a budget cut in the near future. I would not want your job, I like being of use and making a contribution, of some sort, once in a while…..

  29. Melcott says:

    I remember back in the day when my library only had 10 books and the librarian made sure that we each recieved instruction on how to used them.

  30. www.carnegietales.wordpress.com says:

    Those who can’t teach gym…wait for it, wait for it…BECOME LIBRARY DIRECTORS. Oh, how I crack myself up.