There’s a new blog "meme" going around! I love blog memes, because they’re a great way for librarians who don’t have anything interesting to say to focus their blogging. Actually, this is true of non-librarians as well, so don’t take my comments personally, you librarians-who-tend-to-take-the-AL-personally, you. The latest I’ve seen is a "day in the life" meme someone at LIS News posted about. As memes go, that’s a pretty clever one, and I’m glad some clever person came up with it, because I, too, have nothing to write about since I haven’t had time to focus my thoughts on how libraries are eminently bourgeois institutions and why they should stay that way.
You might think a day in the life of the Annoyed Librarian is mostly pleasant and enjoyable. You’d be correct, but in the spirit of personal openness these memes inspire, I’ll lay out a typical day in the life of the Annoyed Librarian. Or yesterday, at least.
9:00am: The Annoyed Librarian awakens as the aroma of coffee wafts into her bedroom. Coffee is good. People making coffee for me is better. I murmur a pleasant "good morning" as a cup of steamy goodness is deposited by my bedside and the gentle strains of Brahms lilt through the apartment.
9:00 – 10:00am: I drink my coffee and nibble some toast and fruit while reading the news and responding to email. Wheat toast and strawberries are my favorite, but I’m flexible. No Pop-tarts or leftover pizza or anything like that, though. What an awful way to start the morning! When news in real world gets too depressing, I read library news and get a chuckle.
10:00 – 10:45am: Bathing, dressing, etc.
10:45am – 11:00am: Head to the library. Acclimate myself to the musty surroundings.
11:00am – 1:00pm: Meet with people about library things. This is the low point in the day, when I start to wonder what some librarians would do if they didn’t have someone to clean up after them and change their little nappies.
1:00pm – 2:00pm: Lunch. You might think that the AL has an exorbitant lunch every day at the Algonquin Round Table, but no. The AL prefers yogurt in the park with a quiet book, perhaps followed by a short walk if the weather’s nice.
2:00pm – 3:30pm: Meet with some more people about more library things. By this time I’m usually thinking most people could solve their own darn problems if either, a) they put any effort into it, or b) obstructionist people would commit suicide to put themselves out of our misery. Usually one of the other or maybe both is all it takes.
3:30pm – 4:00pm: Head to the enormous corner office on the 30th floor of the famous Library Journal Building. Have Chip make me a skim latte and massage my feet.
4:00pm – 4:30pm. Read the AL fan mail. Research the blog. Write the posts. They don’t pay me this enormous salary for nothing!
4:30 – 5:30pm: A little yoga. Some prefer yoga to wake themselves up. I like to unwind after my tough day.
5:30pm – 7:30pm: Happy Hour! My favorite part of the day. I’m fond of a Tanqueray martini or two, which Chip mixes for myself and the AL minions. Ideally, there will be cheese and some of those plum tomatoes to snack on.
7:30pm – 8:30pm: Depending on the intensity of the conversation or the martinis, I’m not always sure what happens during this time.It’s fun, though.
8:30-9:30pm: Dinner, mostly. Last night I had some very tasty sushi.
10:00pm: By now, at least on a weeknight, I’m back home and relaxing. This it prime reading time. What can I say? I’m a bookish wallflower at heart. I might also deal with email or library crises if there are any, but I prefer to relax with an improving book.
Midnight: Sleepytime for the AL. One needs one’s beauty sleep.
So there you have it, a typical weekday for the AL. The weekends are much the same, except fewer library meetings and more social events. At least now you can see that I have no more glamor than you in my daily life, only in my wardrobe.