Annoyed Librarian
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Happy Birthday to Me!

Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday, dear AL, Happy birthday to me!

In case I didn’t mention it, it’s my birthday! The AL turned 4. Actually, the AL turned 4 three days ago, but the party is tonight, so I’m celebrating now.

And what a party it promises to be. Chip and I and all the merry LJ gang plan to dance the night away in the rotating ballroom on the top floor of the Library Journal building. I love big band music. Harry James, here I come! Drinking champagne, whirling around the dance floor, taking quick breaks to catch my breath while gazing out on the bright city lights. Everyone’s invited!

And my dance card promises to be full. Though escorted by my companion, I’ve promised Chip many dances. I warned him that the more I dance, the more he’ll have to massage my little feet at work, but he’s such a devoted factotum and majordomo he just doesn’t care. He’s like Jeeves, except blond and buff, and maybe not as smart. Brains aren’t everything, though. Just ask my critics.

Also, what a long, strange trip it’s been. The AL’s gone from total obscurity to cult favorite to pariah to bigger cult favorite to even bigger pariah to whatever she is now. Maybe I’m an institution now. I’m so in love with myself, it’s almost insufferable, isn’t it?

But what about the future? Ahh, the future. Who knows. For now, I plan, as we said in the seventies, to keep on keeping on. Or was that the eighties? I can’t remember. Too many martinis. You know what they say about the seventies and eighties. If you remember them, you weren’t there. Carter just thought he killed the three martini lunch. He hadn’t met the Annoyed Librarian.

So here’s to another year of the AL. Thanks for you all!



  1. Father Time says:

    The funny thing is, you have the logic and abilities of most four year olds.

    I hope kindergarten helps you improve.

  2. another f-ing librarian says:

    father time is hilaaaaaarious. (bet he’s just mad ’cause he didn’t have the presence of mind to become annoyed *five* years ago, and start typing.)

    happy birthday a.l.!

  3. father time says:

    Sorry, I have a real job.

    I am not just a journalist who poses as a librarian.

    Now get back to work. Or probably in your case, get back to Facebook and see if you have any friends.

  4. party pooper scooper says:

    Geesh, way to rain on the parade, father time.. Was that necessary? Talk about behaving like a child..

    Happy Birthday AL! Never mind the detractors, keep on truckin’!

  5. father time says:


    AL Blogs about birthdays.

    I be AL tweets about each and ever wee and poo.

    Talk about your twotopian.

  6. TheIlliterateLibrarian says:

    While I don’t always agree with you, AL, you always make me think. Happy birthday!

  7. father time says:

    You people have no backbone or true commitment.

    You deserve to be underpaid, underworked, and overlooked.

  8. I'll be there says:

    Will you be the person with the black bar in front of your eyes?

  9. Happy Birthday!

  10. Mr. Twotopian says:

    Happy Birthday AL!!!!

    Thank you for bringing a sharp, laser focused attack on the library world.

    Without you, we would be lost.

    Do you have a Facebook page where we can see you with your cake?

    Or is there a way we can contribute on-line so you can go out and get hammered on expensive martinis?

    Please keep us all informed about all those wonderful things that go on in your great brain.

    All hail the Mighty AL.

  11. Post postmodern Librarian says:

    Happy B-Day Al I have enjoyed being a reader these last few years. Thanks for trying to fix the silliness even if you have to fight a few windmills of father time.

  12. father time says:

    The truth hurts.

    Maybe AL can tweet about that.

  13. NotMariantheLibrarian says:

    Happy birthday AL! May your year be filled with martinis and foot massages.

    father time – aren’t you the Gloomy Gus?

  14. father time says:

    I am sorry.

    I don’t know anyone as famous as the AL.

    Imagine, being able to blog about crap. No one else has ever done that.

    If it weren’t for the peons who kept up stupid, lame comments (yes, like this one)the AL would be shelving books and eating cat food.

    Have a wonderful day.

  15. post postmodern Librarian says:

    Well now I been thinking maybe Father Time is right AL is a journalist. But you know this makes its a double shame for Librarians because it takes an outsider to find the truths and talk about our problems. For to long insiders have lied to us. Go gettem Al! Whether you are a librarian or a journalist keep challenges us to do better and become a profession not a club.

  16. Mr. Garrison says:

    Jesus H. Tap Dancing Christ.

    If you think that all was sunshine and light before the AL, you are indeed a moron.

    All AL did was give pissed off librarians a place to bitch and moan on the internets.

    Being the collectively passive simps that brought us to this glorious trade, we don’t do much else.

    Thanks AL for giving us a forum for us to take inaction.

  17. RadicalPatron says:

    Mr. Garrison > a forum to take inaction. Good one.

  18. Methinks that the AL blog is a plot by management to smoke us out and find out how we really feel.

    Sadly most of us have taken the bait and are being dragged into this Republican pit.


  19. There is a lot of bile being displayed here, children. Stop it.

    AL, thanks for putting yourself out there and giving us an interesting read.

    I suppose if so many people dislike your column so vehemently it means you’re getting through to them.

  20. Number One Son says:

    “There is a lot of bile being displayed here, children. Stop it. ”

    The AL started it.

  21. Number One Son says:

    “There is a lot of bile being displayed here, children. Stop it. ”

    The AL started it.

  22. SDlibrarian says:

    Thanks for your insights into the field. Keep up the good work!

    Thank you!

  23. Captain Spalding says:

    Thank you Captain Obvious.

    Now, when are we going to see some viable solutions for our future?

  24. Number Two Son says:

    “”There is a lot of bile being displayed here, children. Stop it. ”

    The AL started it.”

    AL did not, so nyah.

  25. Man, I hate librarians. But I like AL. Happy Birithday.

  26. Imperial Jaded says:

    “Man, I hate librarians. But I like AL. Happy Birithday.”

    Thanks for being part of the problem and not part of the solution.

  27. Auntie Nanuuq says:

    I’ll drink to that…pass the Coralejos…

  28. Hank Hill says:

    I love it when a bunch of twopointtopians gather to celebrate meaningless events.

  29. anonymoose says:

    gosh, you’re a self centered little git, aren’t you? who cares? even better that this is free content, i’ll stop reading you now, since i’m getting what i paid for.

  30. Happy Birthday, AL! Spectacular blog. I really enjoy it. I wish you many, many more years of posting.

  31. “Happy Birthday, AL! Spectacular blog. I really enjoy it. I wish you many, many more years of posting.”

    Chip, your slip is showing.

  32. “Happy Birthday, AL! Spectacular blog. I really enjoy it. I wish you many, many more years of posting.”

    Chip, your slip is showing.

  33. Happy B-day a couple of weeks late, ye olde curmudgeon!

  34. A Real Curmdgeion says:

    Quoting the AL from earlier in the year:

    “I can’t figure out what significance a new calendar year is supposed to have. The only years that have much impact on my professional life are academic and fiscal, and we’re only halfway through those. A new year, supposedly, will bring new optimism or something like that. ”

    unless of course you are strapped for ideas and want a bunch of false praise because the earth has orbited four times around the sun while you have cranked out bile.

    If it floats your boat, but don’t burden us with your OCD hangups.

    God Bless!

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