Annoyed Librarian
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Inside Annoyed Librarian

No Escape from the Crazy

There are some things you shouldn’t have to put up with as a librarian. It’s not like we’re making the money or receiving the training to deal with potentially violent crazy people.

And while some librarians no doubt get their fair amount of trolling online, considering how many use Twitter, there are some things that should stay online.

Unfortunately for a librarian in St. Louis, there’s no escape from the crazy.

Some creep called up the librarian and started ranting about the Holocaust, as in there wasn’t one. It’s too bad work phones usually don’t have the ability to block calls.

The two-minute voicemail the creep left started, “No evidence of gas chambers.” Uh huh.

He, and of course it’s a he, ends, ““It’s all coming to bear. So, I would get really nervous if I was you.”

What goes through the sad, crazy little minds of people like this? If the point is to intimidate, then why the nonsense historical lesson? Do nuts like this think they could convince the person they’re threatening that they’re correct?

Even worse, this was an academic librarian with presumably some knowledge of the Holocaust. The sad little men seem to believe everyone is as gullible as he is.

It would be great if the police could catch this creep. Besides years of jail time for harassing someone who’s dedicated a professional life to educating other people, there should really be some sort of reeducation.

It might help to start with the treatment Alex gets in A Clockwork Orange. Instead of whatever they forced him to look at for hours, this clown should have to look at hours of Stormfront while receiving tiny electric shocks over an over.

If that’s too mean, if it brings us “down to their level,” then perhaps hundreds of hours of footage of Holocaust evidence.

Okay, maybe the whole “forcing the eyelids open for hours” thing is still bringing us down to their level.

Would solitary confinement with nothing but histories of the Holocaust and the Jews be too much? We could start him with maybe Simon Schama’s The Story of the Jews and maybe Martin Gilbert’s The Holocaust.

If solitary confinement is too harsh, and there’s evidence it usually is, then perhaps all the books about the history of the Holocaust and of the Jews but with a cellmate. There are probably some rabbis in prison. They’re persons of God, but they can’t all be crime-free.

That would be the catalyst for the sort of conversion story that occasionally bubbles through to the news, like when one of those Westboro Baptist Church people decides that hating everyone in the world kind of takes it out of one, or that story about the right-wing fanatic who went to college and got love-bombed by Jewish students when they found out he and his dad were anti-Semitic radio hosts.

It would help if the rabbi were funny as well, maybe a Billy Crystal type. Then he could forge a human bond with this alleged fellow human being through the time-honored tradition of Jewish humor. And if not, then he could make constant jokes at the creep’s expense.

It would almost be enough if creeps like this stayed behind their keyboards and didn’t try to interact with the real world. It at least keeps innocent librarians from having to listen to their malign nonsense.

What a world we’re living in now.



  1. anonymous coward says:

    are you really suggestiing punishment and “reeducation” (where have I hear that phrase before…) for people because they leave a crazy voicemail?

    Jumping sharks a new hobby?

    • I thought the same thing. We don’t need ‘reeducation’. Isn’t that what the communists and fascists did/do?

  2. During my time in public service I found that the ability or inability to recognize mental illness in others, and proceed with the same tact or forbearance you would show to ill people generally, was a reliable proxy for IQ. Or perhaps common sense. This was a very dispiriting realization – few of you will be getting prizes.

  3. So the moral of this story is that we should re-educate Ivanka, right?

  4. Mmmmhhhh. I can see .

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